Just when you thought..
The crying was over.
Understanding and excepting.
You were ready to move on with it.
It'll always fall right back into your lap.
So, Grandma B has been gone for exactly 1 month 1 week and 1 day. Physically not spiritually. God, why did you have to make the 'bad' be a sacrifice for the 'good'. For this situation, I just cant figure out what the good is. It'll all get better in time, It's just the fight to actually get there. She's in a better place, not suffering, and watching over us--- but what I would give for just ONE more day. She always wanted to babysit my daughter, she was always worried that Tridel wouldnt know who she is, I just knew that she wasnt physically able to watch her all day. Now I kick myself in the face with regret. Lately Mama's been visiting her quite a bit, (thanks mama), & I hope that she knows we all loved her sooo much and will always remember her.
I know with this kind of situation, you can't just shake it off. I thought a break-up with your boyfriend was hard, well i've just faced the ultimate HEART challenge. Boyfriend drama is sh*t. (bless my mouth). Mama always wanted us to forgive, forget, appreciate before its to late, and now I know why. I got mad at grandma for feeding my child pizza! pizza!! How silly is that. She can feed her ice-cream and cake for all I care now. But guess what it's to late. In closing, I hope she's feeling better, watching over us, knowing grandma-->she's probably pimp'n it in heaven, WAITING for papa. Mama, nobody's ready for you to have him yet okay. I love you Mama B. May you Rest In Peace..
GOD BLESS.
1 comment:
Aw shit SHY!! *bless my mouth* thanks for the teary eyed, sore heart "vommit in the mouth" feeling. i know its hard to deal with her being gone. and it is hard as shit to understand why she left us. but as corney as it sounds things will get easier. they will. im a hip-o-crit. by saying that because for me i still cry and get head aches and all that stuff. but now is our chance to get close with papa. we always clinged to mama thats normal to bond with the woman but now is papas turn. like anty kawai says. we have him here and we need to cherish the life he has left with us. we are the lucky ones. we had mama when ever we wanted and we now have papa when ever we want. our other family has to fly here to see him. so we need to take it all in as much as we can. spend time with him and comfort him in this time of need. when im with him i feel closer to mama for some reason. thats why i been wanting to go up there. because ive been missing her like crazy i just want a hug from papa.
so i going a'au and hele on to haiku.
love ya see ya up there!
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